Showing posts with label Phony Outrage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Phony Outrage. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Never Do Anything Smart or Funny


Someone somewhere is going to be highly offended and put out by the adaptation of Paddington for the big screen. This is a reflection of the culture--no matter what you do, expect phony outrage and bullshit for your troubles. We live in a culture where there are genuine racist and improper statements made all the time. Because the people who legitimately react to these slights are given a tremendous amount of media coverage and moral authority, others pile onto the bandwagon.

Paddington is thus a bandwagon for phony outrage. Never offend anyone ever. Don't even make a dandruff joke about being a stuffed bear. It will lead to hurt feelings and Tweets and screaming.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Leave David Schwimmer Alone


There is absolutely no chance that you are going to get through a Gawker piece on someone who was famous in the 1990s without it turning into a pissing contest about real estate or sex. In this case, it's about David Schwimmer and real estate. Coulda been worse.

The hard-luck sadboys and sadgirls of the Gawker staff have the ass for the idea that Schwimmer might want to live in New York City and do something to modernize or improve the community. By tearing down a home built in the early 1850s, he is now equal to the devil or some such bullshit. Of course, the idea that a townhome in New York is the same as a home built in Paris or London in the 1600s is kind of ridiculous. From a European perspective, 1852 is nothing; in New York, it's merely a firetrap and a public safety hazard waiting to happen.

Schwimmer, who made the mistake of not inhaling his money and throwing it into the wind, is thus not allowed to build a safe, modern, and valuable home where an unsafe, old, and less valuable home once stood. He is not allowed to add to the New York City tax base in a positive way and his is not allowed to improve the value of the place where he lives by investing money into making it better. He's not allowed to bring a building into existence that meets the modern fire code. He's not allowed to do something that demonstrates just how much he wants to live in a place and have a home there. No, we hates what we hates, and we hates the spending of the moneys, you see.

Celebrities and bullshit are a routine thing now, and it is nobody's business what Schwimmer does but we think it is because of envy and things like that. If he was my neighbor, I wouldn't spray paint anonymous hate messages about him because, well, who the hell does that anyway? The world is full of entitled, seething, hateful psychopaths and that's why we can't have nice things.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Steven Crowder is a Fraud


The fact that it took a mere matter of days to unmask Steven Crowder as an absolute fraud and a man guilty of criminally assaulting another human being should come as no shock to anyone with a brain. Since he has admitted starting the altercation, he should be charged with assault. By his own admission, that's the minimum of what he is guilty of.

This incident should set off bells in every newsroom in America. If someone affiliated with Breitbart.com or Fox News, et al, makes any future claim of being assaulted in public, then that claim should be dismissed as another false flag operation designed to mislead and inflame the public. These people have no credibility.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Fear of a Black Planet


Mike Tyson is clearly having fun at the expense of Sarah Palin and with the elements in American society who cannot handle the topic of interracial sex.

Is Tyson being sexist and degrading? Yes. He should be condemned for what he is saying because there's no defense for talking about women in that way. Tyson's own history is so troubling on the subject as to not be believed.

There is a defense for what he's saying, and I don't necessarily think it is a fully formed one. He's commenting on America's current cultural divides. But he's doing it in a way that is culturally significant because he's commenting on the very real phenomenon of interracial sex. Much of the reason why the Tea Party exists is because of a fear of an African-American president. Sarah Palin has spent the last couple of years appealing to that base and has courted it by talking at length about guns and family values and her meaning is, when stripped down, that only guns and family values will save us from that black guy in the White House.

Palin can put up a cross-hairs over the Congressional District of a Democrat but Mike Tyson can't joke about "the Wombshifter?" Come on. Shooting people is simply not the same as screwing their brains out. 

The same people who are outraged are the ones who'd be laughing hysterically if the same thing were being said about Michelle Obama. Imagine Mike Tyson going on a similar rant about how Michelle Obama needs to be with a 'real' black man. Oh, the clowns at the Daily Caller would run that, too. And Breitbart would have that video up there, faux outrage affixed as well. See, it's all about the target and the context. When a Democrat is the target, they can use rhetoric about snipers and guns and the Second Amendment and real Americans. When they become the target, you'd think they were timid bunnies leaving a trail of pellets from here to the back entrance of the Fainting Couch factory.

All Tyson has done--as a convicted felon and as a powerless African-American male--is say the things that drive those sympathetic with the Tea Party out of their minds. They have a fear of sexualized and potent African-American males that eats at their very souls. They are terrified of an erect black male penis and they cannot stomach the idea of losing their half-pretty girlfriend or wife to a charismatic guy with dark skin and a better-paying job. Want to clear a room full of these dead-enders? Show them a picture of a functioning and erect black male penis. Nothing says denial like acquainting someone with what frightens them and intrigues them at the same time. Explain this to them and their heads would explode. No wonder the Tea Party has taken up the mantra of denying Viagra to any and all who want it. They want this country to become a paradise for shriveled manhood. The erect penis has become a symbol of liberalism. Hey, alright!

Each and every single thing that Mike Tyson says is outrageous and ugly, but he's saying it so that a specific group of people will understand that America is not about rolling over for the limp-dicked, pseudo-tough guy rhetoric of the racists in the Tea Party.

I mean, honestly. If the Tea Party rank and file were half as tough as they pretend to be, this sort of thing wouldn't even bother them, would it? Of course not. They remember how fun it was to lynch people. They remember how easy it was to get a couple hundred of their friends and neighbors together so that they could go teach the Mike Tysons of the world a lesson. The world has changed and they simply can't get away with it anymore. Darn the luck.

No wonder they dream of taking us back to the 1800s. It was so much easier to get rope, a crowd, a photographer, and an uppity black man to satisfy their urges.
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Wednesday, January 6, 2010

A Calamity That Could Have Taken Down Our Republic


When I found myself weeping uncontrollably this morning, I knew it had to be because something had gone terribly wrong during a Bowl Game that I did not bother to watch:

University of Missouri administrators have apologized to the U.S. Naval Academy for what it says was a misunderstanding by its band during the Texas Bowl game last week.

The band has been criticized on blogs and online news forums for playing the Missouri fight song after the Naval Academy began playing its theme song after the game.

The two bands had agreed before the game that the losing team's band would play first, followed by the winner. Navy defeated Missouri 35-13 in last Thursday's game. Missouri spokeswoman Mary Jo Banken said Missouri's band didn't realize the Naval Academy had begun playing.

She says the school did not intend to to disrespect Navy tradition. The Naval Academy issued a statement saying it considered the issue a misunderstanding.

If I don't do any more blogging today, it's because I had to reach out and holla at my peeps, and let them know that I was okay.