A Bunch of Dicks Who Tell Fart Jokes

I would say that this is completely the opposite of what he meant:

Blink 182‘s Mark Hoppus has spoken out about the shifting perception of the band, arguing that after over 20 years together they’ve proven that they’re ‘not just a bunch of idiots telling fart and dick jokes’.

The singer and bassist was speaking to NME at Rock Werchter 2017 just before the band kicked off their UK tour in support of their acclaimed and chart-topping comeback album ‘California‘ – their seventh album in their 25 years as a band. However, Hoppus argues that much has changed in how the world views them over the years.

When did that "proof" arrive? I must have missed it. No one should ever go to the media and say "hey, we're not a joke." Having to say that means that, yes, you are a joke.

This is What the TSA Has In Mind For You

Unfortunate timing, to say the least:

If the new head of the Transportation Security Administration gets his way, all airport screeners will be retrained within 60 days to better detect explosives and spot weapons and more passengers will enroll in the agency's expedited security checkpoint program.

And one day travelers will be able to use fingerprints or some other biometric identifiers instead of paper or electronic boarding passes.

Peter Neffenger, who has been on the job as TSA administrator for four weeks, went before the House Homeland Security Committee on Wednesday and said it was a "huge concern" that the agency's officers failed to identify bombs, weapons and other security threats 96 percent of the time during recent undercover testing.

"It greatly disturbs me to know that we had that failure rate at the checkpoint," he said.

The nature of those failures have been carefully studied, Neffenger told the panel, underscoring an immediate need to "train out those failures."

International traveler Stephen Morrissey has a story to tell:

On leaving the US on 27 July I flew from San Francisco International Airport to London on flight BA 284.

At 2:30 in the afternoon I went through the usual airport security procedure including the stand-up 'scanner', and all was well - no bleeps and nothing unusual.

Before I could gather my belongings from the usual array of trays I was approached by an "airport security officer" who stopped me, crouched before me and groped my penis and testicles. He quickly moved away as an older "airport security officer" approached.

The officer who sexually assaulted me was identified as the General Manager On Duty. Luckily I was accompanied by two members of British Airways Special Services, who were horrified at the sexual attack and suggested that I lodge a complaint. I asked if there would be any point in lodging a complaint since, as with any complaint against a figure in "authority", the complaints are simply collected in order to protect the guilty officer should the matter go further. The British Airways Special Services employees assured me that a complaint was worthwhile, and so I filed the appropriate information.

Here's what the TSA is doing wrong--Morrissey is not a threat to you or anyone else. Leave Morrissey alone and focus on the people who are actually breaking the rules.

It's like we're stuck on stupid or something.

A Jackass in His Private Life

I don't know if it is useful to compare Mel Gibson with Kanye West, but it does make my life easier to do so.

Both have suffered numerous professional setbacks because of their behavior (although, to be fair, there's no comparison between Kanye and noted woman beater Chris Brown) and both have demonstrated that they have self-control issues.

Kanye has been called a jackass by the President of the United States. Gibson has been called far worse. But this is where the public and private personas come into contrast, and they couldn't be more stark. Privately, Kanye is, reputedly, a very caring and generous person. If you believe what Aziz Ansari says, Kanye is a decent human being who cares about others.

I would never believe Joe Eszterhas about anyone or anything, however. He is what you would call an impeachable source. But if he has tapes of Gibson ranting and raving about Jewish people, I would say that this is a very good example of how Gibson can present a public face that is apologetic and conciliatory while maintaining a private persona that is equal parts jackass and maniac.

Do you know who might have painted the most accurate picture of all? South Park.