History

The Scum of the Earth

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Are we accustomed to the idea that there is no meritocracy? And that celebrities who pay to put their underachieving influencer kids in colleges where they don’t belong are a normal thing we have to deal with now?

No, because these people committed felonies:

Actress Lori Loughlin appeared in Los Angeles federal court Wednesday afternoon, following her arrest for involvement in what authorities say is the largest college admission scam in the United States. The actress has been charged with allegedly funnelling $500,000 to rowing coaches at the University of Southern California in order to secure admission to the elite school for her two daughters, Isabella and Olivia, also known as the YouTube influencer Olivia Jade. 

According to court documents published by Buzzfeed News, Loughlin’s bribe allowed for both girls to be accepted as rowing recruits, despite the fact that neither teenager plays crew. Loughlin’s husband, fashion designer Mossimo Giannulli, also named among the 50 individuals charged in the indictment, appeared in court Tuesday.

If you want to bring back the guillotine, I would caution you that what follows probably isn’t that great. I like your enthusiasm and energy, and I think you have a lot of spunk, but you need to tone it down a bit. I do think that the end result of all of this should be a lot of mockery, jail time, and restitution:

Even Loughlin’s daughters are starting to feel the social hurt of the scandal. On Tuesday, TMZ reported that Loughlin’s influencer daughter, Olivia Jade, had spent the night before her mother’s arrest on a yacht in the Bahamas owned by Chairman of USC's Board of Trustees Rick Caruso. On Wednesday afternoon, just as  Loughlin prepared to leave federal court on bail, she had “decided it would be in her best interests to return home” and left Caruso’s yacht, he told TMZ. 

She may be facing more than just her mother's indictment, however. Late Wednesday, USC issued a statement announcing plans to “conduct a case-by-case review for current students and graduates that may be connected to the scheme alleged by the government.”

Yeah, that’s totally normal. I would be willing to bet you that she wasn’t the only privileged kid forced to leave a cruise on a yacht because one or both parents were arrested by the FBI on just any old day of the week.

It’s time to accept the fact that hard work and talent mean nothing in this country. We are no different than the British, the French, or the Germans. Who you are and where you are in this life are largely determined by what your parents do for a living. If you were born of the right stock, go ahead and get high on your own stash and pretend to be able to function in polite society. If not, get ready to pound sand. You can work hard your whole life and you’re never going to have anything remotely similar to what the chinless failson of a billionaire will be handed. The quicker we figure out that the only decent people in this country are the ones who are white, sexually deviant, and wealthy, the better. Everyone else is a perpetrator, a serf, or a basic poor.

Thank God we’re not in the middle of a real shooting war. I would hate to see what the cannon fodder would look like. Probably a lot of stressed out kids who could only get into State universities.

The Perils of Being Royal

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I have noticed that the British tabloid press has decided that it will be profitable (and fun!) to destroy Meghan Markle for the crime of being an interesting American woman who happens to be married to Prince Harry.

The press are being aided and abetted in this noble endeavor by those inside of the Royal family’s immense staff who wish to make trouble for the newlyweds. While the world burns down all around us, they have decided that this will be the seasonal fun of the English people. They will make humans miserable in order to have their old pecking order back the way it was when Harry was a single man.

Not sure if this is going to work out the way people expect it will. First, they could end up driving the couple out of the country. They could live anywhere, but I’m guessing they will move to California and have a non-traditional life, which is probably what they want to have happen in the first place. I mean, you could live in Malibu, or fucking London, and deal with wonderful weather and mildly amusing people or the hell of the British tabloid press and the shit sandwich that is the way of life they see right now. Grandma isn’t dying any time soon and who wants to live under the batty King Charles when it happens?

Second, they could end up accomplishing nothing because, at the end of the day, Princes William and Harry have a plan in place, and that plan will be to quietly turn the Royal family into something similar to what they have in Scandinavia when their Grandmother and Father are dead. They have no stomach for what was done to their mother which, to me, looks very similar to what’s being done to Meghan. Scores need to be settled, and these two young men have always looked ready to bury some knives in the backs of the people who carried out so many awful schemes against Princess Diana.

Third, this is all bullshit being done to sell “clicks” or papers in a country that is being torn into pieces by Russian trolls, right wing zealots, and actual fucking racist trash. You’d think the press would be more obsessed with what Brexit will do rather than an American princess, but how the hell does that sell anything to anyone?

I have always thought that William and Harry have a pact, and that they will unleash a hellish purge of the people who were behind the demonization of their mother. If those same people are trying to destroy the marriage of the youngest prince, God help them when the funerals are over.

No, No We Don't Answer That

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There is no contrition on the part of Bill Cosby. He imagines himself Jesus, and he has a view of himself that believes he is being persecuted so he can maintain the air of superiority that a PhD used to provide:

Bill Cosby was sentenced to several years in prison on Tuesday for sexually assaulting a woman over a decade ago. 

Judge Steven O’Neill gave Cosby, 81, a sentence of between three and 10 years in prison for attacking Andrea Constand in 2004. Constand is one of more than 60 women who have accused the previously beloved comedian of preying on them over the past five decades.

The real tragedy is that this didn’t happen fifty years ago when it really would have taken a bite out of the quality of his life and prevented many more victims from having to experience what it was like to be drugged and raped.

It all started four years ago:

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Camille Cosby smiles, uncomfortably shifting in her chair. Staring off camera, switching positions, silent. In the latest contribution to the Bill Cosby saga, we see husband and wife side by side as he addresses the very act of questioning about his numerous rape allegations in an AP interview (above). Mrs. Cosby continues to smile and looks away from the reporter several times, both she and her husband presuming that the cameras have stopped rolling. I will not read into her silence. I will not pull meaning about this woman and her thoughts and decisions other than to say that in the watching, the silence is palpable, wince-inducing and profoundly painful.

That exchange highlights the most meaningful currency in this 30+ year long drama that is just now seeing its climax unfold on the public stage: silence. At every turn, it is the silence that serves as a proxy for power in the story of Bill Cosby, his alleged sexual deviance and the current downward spiral of public opinion. Silence here, as in most cases, represents the power wielded and power taken by those who are seen as, well, powerful.

Everything went to hell after that interview. More women came forward. You could feel the momentum shift. Cosby and his legal team have done everything in their power to destroy every victim, delay the judgement of the courts, and keep him out of prison.

So long, motherfucker.