Freddie Mercury

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If Rami Malek can pull this off, he deserves an Oscar. He deserves ALL the awards.

I never thought that they could make a movie about Freddie Mercury because how the hell do you portray someone so iconic? How would you make a movie about David Bowie or Prince? Who on Earth could play those guys and not pale in comparison to what we had in real life? I don't think anyone has ever done Elvis justice, either.

The trailer is great, but this seems self-serving and bitchy:

Writer and producer Bryan Fuller is accusing 20th Century Fox of “hetero-washing” the story of Queen frontman Freddie Mercury in a new trailer and marketing materials for the biopic “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

“Anyone else mildly annoyed … that the #BohemianRhapsody trailer features gay/bi superstar Freddie Mercury flirting with and twirling with a woman but no indication of his love of men?” Fuller tweeted on Tuesday after the clip hit the web.

The footage shows actress Lucy Boynton staring longingly at star Rami Malek as Mercury, also leaping into his arms. Boynton plays Mary Austin, who some credit as Mercury’s muse but is not well known in pop culture. The trailer also features a young man coming on to Malek’s Mercury in a recording studio, but it’s blink-and-miss.

You can't judge a movie based on watching the trailer, but why should that stop anyone, right? Who knows what the film really deals with? And, honestly, this could be one of the greatest performances ever if Malek can convince people he's Freddie. Enjoy it! Don't bitch at it.

Sex Tape Lawyer

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It is because I am a naive boy who was raised on the Minnesota prairie that I did not know that one could aspire to the job of "sex tape lawyer."

I knew there were lawyers, of course, and I knew that if you went to college and then law school, you could practice law anywhere in the country. Anywhere in the world, maybe, although being a lawyer amongst people who don't care about the law is a worthless endeavor.

Did you grow up wanting to be a sex tape lawyer? Was there a void in your life? A need for titillation? I don't want to judge, but becoming a lawyer who specializes in the litigation of who owns what when it comes to a sex tape is like throwing away good talent and hard work. What did you do to get to the top of that industry? Where did you advertise? Who did you have to con in order to make it big?

Come on, spill it.  You have to have people with specific legal needs, the money to transact between each other, and a surfeit of sex tapes that will allow you to be the litigator you always wanted to be, a lawyer who handles the legal ramifications of sex tapes.

Pretty good gig, I suppose. You could make millions. That's all that matters today.

Now, go away.

Who are these horrible shits? These terrible people with no morals and a mastery of the ins and outs of the laws surrounding people who film themselves having sex with others who don't necessarily know (wink, wink) they are being filmed for prurient reasons?

Who injected these foul, misbegotten garbage can people into our politics and our discourse? We are not supposed to have to explain to ourselves how this goes on. I'm not some moral prude. I don't care if Bill Clinton got a blowjob. I would expect that he would have been a bit more careful about it, but okay. 

But this? These people around Trump?

Why, they're the equivalent of a massive ball of fat, lard and shit coagulated in the pipes below London Town. They're holding back the flow of the rest of the sewage we don't want to live in, the flow that takes it to the treatment plant and cleans it up as it should be sanitized and handled. 

Your taxes pay for that service. But the people around Trump are wasting our time, frittering away our money, and letting their personal immorality get in the way of solving real problems. God, just fuck these people for being so unpalatable and rancid in the way that they do things. What a waste, seeing these sex tape lawyers go at it like starving hyenas.

Andie MacDowell Has Always Been Underappreciated

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Here is another rare example of an older woman making art in Hollywood:

Throughout a 34-year career marked by films as varied as sex, lies and videotapeGroundhog Day and Four Weddings and a Funeral, Andie MacDowell has proven that she can do it all. 

Nonetheless, she’s never done anything quite as superb as her work in Love After Love, in which she stars as a woman coming to grips with the death of her husband, and the tumultuous individual and familial upheaval created by that loss. As Suzanne, MacDowell exudes a bracing mix of vulnerability, tenderness and longing, as well as a healthy dose of misery and bitterness that comes to the fore during her many scenes opposite Chris O’Dowd (as Suzanne’s misstep-making son Nicholas). It’s a tale of grief, dysfunction and survival that heralds its first-time writer/director Russell Harbaugh as one of American cinema’s finest new artists, and reconfirms MacDowell’s standing as a Hollywood star of formidable charisma and complexity.

MacDowell has always been treated differently by the film community. Her southern accent has been held against her since day one. Her ability to act has never been in doubt, but she has suffered because of her fashion model good looks (as if that's even possible, and it is).

I'm glad she's working but I wish there was more for her to do. I wish there was more for people who are older and don't care for super hero movies to see and experience because this would be a great time for telling stories about living in an age when our politics aren't working and our lives and work are changing minute by minute. MacDowell would be great in anything relatable because she has always made that her strength. If she isn't being denigrated for her looks, then someone probably has an issue with her age.

It's not fair for her, or for any actress in her generation, to have to struggle to make art when her abilities are simply not in question. What is problematic here is that the people who control what gets made in Hollywood have never come to terms with the fact that older people like stories they can relate to.

Carl's Jr is a Stupid Company

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Apparently, there's no fun allowed anywhere, and whoever is running things at Carl's Jr. is an idiot:

Fast food restaurant chain Carl's Jr. is getting in on the hype for Steven Spielberg's latest movie, Ready Player One.

On Sunday, Carl's Jr. tweeted that it would be changing the name of its charbroiled sliders to "SpielBurgers," in honor of the director and his upcoming film. "Spielberg hasn’t signed off yet, but we assume he’s cool with it," the company wrote.

A Carl's Jr. representative on Tuesday told The Hollywood Reporter, "SpielBurgers are not a menu item at Carl’s Jr. locations. This was a social stunt from the brand to try and get the attention of Spielberg and his team to celebrate the launch of Ready Player One."

You don't go public with something like this unless you have a marketing deal in place. Did they think they were going to shame Steven Spielberg into doing something like this?

Morons.