The Horrible World of Chuck Beaver


Good God.

Chuck Beaver has been arrested for a morals crime?

I doubt very much that anyone would have thought that Chuck Beaver would be a perv.

If Chuck Beaver is a bad guy, who the hell is a good guy?

Chuck Beaver is a guy you have a barbecue with. He's the guy you go golfing with. He's good people when there aren't any other people around.

But, no. Chuck Beaver is one of those people you can't socialize with anymore. He's too stupid to be on the Internet, too horny to let into your house, and he's done. America chews these people up and it spits them out. They run afoul of the law and ruin themselves. No one looks at the cops and their greasy little tactics and the photos they use to catch Chuck Beaver and his ilk. We just want them out there, trying to catch a few more Chuck Beavers.

Well, goddamn, son. Chuck Beaver caught himself.