In the upper left corner of my windshield, I have a parking dial that allows me to park in timed parking spots. Today, that sucker melted. It's 88 degrees, Fahrenheit, in Stuttgart and it is hawt. Don't ask me to convert to Celsius. I'm too hot to move.

It's like wearing three wool sweaters while being basted by the devil while he shoots napalm at you while you turn on a spit that someone has rigged up on a barbecue made out of liquid hot magma and basted in chili sauce and Icy Hot topical creme.

There's almost no recourse from this since the vast majority of places in where you can go in Germany to get a break from this don't have air conditioning. Air conditioning is all but unheard of in Europe because there's no real need for it (at least, there used to not be a need for it) and because of energy costs.

Can I just say that it's hot and leave it at that?

Rain is on the way. This is the summer cycle we're in, I guess.