I'm Not Buying It For a Second

Charlie Sheen's new Hoopdie Ride

One of the things that was evident when actor Carlos Irwin Estevez (aka Charlie Sheen) was arrested at Christmas was that he demonstrated a propensity for exaggerating his knowledge of the law and his ability to get around the law. This happened when he told his wife that he could have her killed and that he could get ex-cops to make it look innocent (that's Brooke Mueller talking, not me).

Now we have a minor incident with his Mercedes and questions about what happened:

A Mercedes that Charlie Sheen reported stolen from his Sherman Oaks home was found overturned hundreds of feet down a nearby cliff early Friday, but there's no evidence anyone was in the car when it went into the ravine, police said.

A Bentley was later found off the same road nearby Friday afternoon, and police said three other cars reportedly were broken into in the same area. Police were investigating if the incidents were linked.

Police got an emergency call around 4 a.m. from an OnStar-style alert system that calls emergency officials when there is a problem with the vehicle that may require assistance, Officer Wendy Reyes said. At about the same time, Sheen called police to say his four-door Mercedes-Benz had been stolen, Officer Bruce Borihanh said.

Police and firefighters found the car 300 to 400 feet down a cliff, upside-down in the brushy ravine. They searched the area on foot and with an infrared-equipped helicopter but found nobody in or around the car, Borihanh said.

"They've looked all around the hillside. There's nobody in the car, nobody around (and no) evidence of anybody being around at the moment of impact," he said.

Sheen was not believed to have been in the car because he would have been badly injured in the accident and "I don't know how he would have gotten back up" the cliff, Borihanh said.

All of that CBS money they're paying him to do his sitcom means that Sheen probably doesn't have money problems, but who knows?

Here's what I think happened: he was out of his mind, he thought he was in an action film, and he put some mattresses by the side of the cliff and dove out of the vehicle before it went over the cliff. Four of his friends disposed of the mattresses and helped him with the full body makeup to cover up the fact that he may, or may not, have gotten a boo boo.

I think this might also be a case of "Ghost Riding the Whip" gone horribly wrong. If so, the YouTube video is going to kick ass, even if this was shot at night. I don't know if this is viable, however. Everyone knows that if you Ghost Ride the Whip in a vehicle with OnStar, those nosy bastards are going to tell the cops what you were doing. Trust me on this.

You cannot accept anything Sheen says at this point. He has zero credibility.