Saturday, May 30, 2009

Another Reason I Won't Do Facebook

Even though I don't have a crazy wife, I'm afraid that all of the hotties would "friend" me and put me in their buddy list thingamabob and cause her to lose her mind. Sort of like what happened here:

Atlanta Falcons offensive lineman Quinn Ojinnaka is free on bond after being accused of fighting with his wife over his Facebook activity, police said Friday.

Ojinnaka, a fourth-year reserve drafted out of Syracuse in the fifth round of 2006, was charged with simple battery, said police spokesman David Schiralli in suburban Gwinnett County.

Police said Ojinnaka's wife confronted him about contact with a female friend on Facebook. Police said he tossed her down some stairs and threw her out of their house in Suwanee late Tuesday.

Ojinnaka, who has started seven of 30 career games, told police his wife began the fight by attempting to stab him with a pen.

Falcons spokesman Reggie Roberts said Friday that coach Mike Smith had talked with Ojinnaka, but the team would have no further comment.

The NFL seems to have a problem with these kinds of things, but then again, society seems to have a problem with these kinds of things. There's no reason why this should end someone's career. Wait a minute--yes, yes it probably should be a warning sign that a career could come to an end. There's no reason why you should throw a spouse down a flight of stairs over a Facebook post. That's something that should maybe cause this young man to sit out for a year.

My dear readers, Facebook is evil. It is corrupt and full of predatory pedophiles. Or is that MySpace? I can't tell the difference.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Space Shuttle is As Boring As Toast

I can remember when the Space Shuttle was a big deal.

Sadly, it's not any kind of a deal anymore, and people are bored with it. The Space Shuttle is about as exciting as riding on an Amtrak train. The only difference is the smell and the presence of politicians. When there are politicians riding an Amtrak train, all bets are off.

You are likely to see full frontal nudity and a stab wound that has bled out on an Amtrak train. You're likely to see someone old, scientific and boring on the Space Shuttle. If they were smart, they would have sent that crazy astronaut into space with a loaded gun and a grudge against half of her crew. They should have dumped her, her rival, and the man she loved on an abandoned space station. The video would have been amazing.

There's a definite lack of drama in the US Space Program right now. Rainy weather is delaying the Space Shuttle landing:

NASA postponed the landing of space shuttle Atlantis until Sunday because of weather concerns.

Rain at Kennedy Space Center in Florida canceled plans to land the space shuttle Atlantis on Saturday.

The next landing opportunity at Florida's Kennedy Space Center will be at 10:11 a.m. ET Sunday, NASA said.

Edwards Air Force Base in California is available as a backup option should landing at Kennedy Space Center not work, NASA said.

It was the second consecutive day that NASA had decided to push back attempts to land the space shuttle because of lingering rainy weather in and around the Gulf of Mexico.
Now, if the people at NASA who are going to be taking over were looking to create some drama, they would let it land in the rain, perhaps while emitting smoke from a wing or something like that. They could strap someone to the rear fin thing and have him pretend to hold something down so that the Space Shuttle can land on one wheel, perhaps. If I was going to stage something, I would have a space dog hanging out of a port on the side with a tether in his mouth, and attached to that tether I would have a plucky female astronaut who is from Texas hanging on for dear life. Do we have any daredevils out there who want to do tricks with the Space Shuttle? Do we have anyone who wants to fix the GPS satellite system? If that thing fails, a lot of pathetic morons are going to be driving into bodies of water or into storefronts. Couldn't we have a band of rebel astronauts go into space with a stolen Space Shuttle, fix all of the GPS satellites, steal an alien technology from a superior alien race, and then crash the Space Shuttle upside down into the river while on fire?

A better post might speculate on where all of the daredevils have gone. I was looking forward to a shuttle landing today, and instead, I get nothing. If I were going to review my own day so far, I would be cruel and say that today has been a dismal failure. Day, you get nothing. You're a disgrace. I have sat here, idly watching television and speculating about when the stock market will break 9,000 and sustain a good rally. Hmm...perhaps I am as boring as toast as well.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Hubble keeps eating dollars

The Hubble Space Telescope (Illustration)

Honestly, I was surprised the Hubble space telescope was still in orbit. I would have put a dollar down on the bar and bet you that it had been turned off and allowed to fall from orbit and land on the nearest wicked witch. Well, that shows you what I know.

According to the Internet, this thing still gets money and funding and repair missions. As Miranda might say, WTF?

The space shuttle Atlantis crew on Thursday prepared to embark on the first of five spacewalks during its 11-day mission to repair the Hubble Space Telescope. After a two-day chase, the shuttle Wednesday captured the telescope with its robotic arm 350 miles above Earth and pulled it into Atlantis' cargo bay for service. The telescope has been latched to a rotating, lazy Susan-type device for five days of repairs and remodeling. An umbilical line has been connected to provide electricity from Atlantis to the telescope, according to NASA. Mission commander Scott Altman also will position the shuttle to allow Hubble's solar arrays to gather energy from the sun and recharge the telescope's batteries. Thursday's spacewalk will begin at 8:16 a.m. ET and is expected to last more than six hours. Astronauts plan to replace a wide-field planetary camera with an updated model and will "install a mechanism for a [future] spacecraft to capture Hubble for de-orbit at the end of its life." Atlantis launched Monday for NASA's fifth and final repair visit to the telescope. It has been seven years since NASA's last mission to service the Hubble, which was designed to go about three years between fixes.

Isn't Maryland Senator Barbara Mikulski responsible for this boondoggle? Is this really a wise allocation of money and resources? I am a man of science, and I support the space program. But if you do any thinking on this matter, you come away with a conclusion that a good idea went astray because someone figured out that it was a cash cow:

Hubble cost a fortune: $6 billion and counting. There are things Hubble can do that ground-based telescopes simply cannot, so comparisons are difficult. But even an expensive telescope on the surface costs more than an order of magnitude less. Is it worth it? Many scientists spent their careers working on Hubble, having their scientific progress ground (haha) to a halt, and some even became pariahs because of it. Had it been managed differently, had it been downsized, had it been not such a political tool, how would that have affected the science itself? We can only speculate — which I generally frown upon — but in this case a little retrospection might be good. We’ll be faced with similar decisions in the future, and of course we already are: going back to the Moon, going to Mars, building the Space Station, and more.

Now might be a good time to start asking questions about how money is spent and allocated in this country. That Hubble was a good idea is not the question. The question is, could we have gotten more bang for less buck? Could we have spent a lot less and built several less expensive platforms in order to give more scientists the ability to conduct studies? If so, where else are we hemmoraging money?

Or is the operative question here centered around doing what is best for the people in power at the expense of the rest of the country? Let's put away childish things and figure out where the money is going. Right now, money is being spent and flying out of Washington like shit through a goose.